My current
Crayola Colour Mood is Electric Lime! Which totally equates to the fact that I
am freaking out, meaning I am in the middle of a freaking pre-mid-life crisis.
Why? You may
well ask. Well I still haven’t got the results of my MA, which zapped years of
my life not to mention the money and sweat, and quite frankly the wait is
turning me into a total basket case. Much as I love Green Day, feeling like a
basket case is not much fun.
I’m all edgy and
strange. I wake up daily from bizarro dreams. I have a constant nagging craving
to do something reckless. I want to change every aspect in my life. Nothing
seems good enough. Nothing seems to be sitting right and indeed if I manage to
sit still for more than five minutes it is a complete miracle. I’m hyper active
yet getting nothing done and it feels like I am totally out of control. In fact
writing this wacky blog is the most productive thing I’ve managed in over a
week.
Hence the
freaking out Electric Lime sensation crawling its way through my veins. If this
was a drug maybe I could find out how to kick it, but this unsettled consciousness,
this knowing that whatever is causing this odd behaviour is out of my control, is
utterly doing my head in.
But hey,
Electric Lime is pretty cool in a way. Perhaps I should see this transitional
phase as a good thing. Perhaps answers will come out of the vivid wilderness. Here’s hoping.
Elloise Hopkins.
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