The title of this blog is a little misleading, because I cannot actually tell you why I am not taking part in NaNoWriMo 2016. Let me explain…
The problem with leading a double life is that the big things in life, the key events, the monumental decisions, the terrible lows and disappointments, and the wonders, are all too much to be contained in one aspect of life; they spill over from one identity to the next. There may be two faces here – the me that reviews and writes and the me that works the day job – but we are one and the same. We are a duo. A juggling act.
Confused? Not too much, I hope. Essentially the me that is writing my Aethera novels and reviewing books and attending conventions and dwelling in the fantasy fiction world has had to take a back seat in 2016 because of life changing decisions and focus on a secret project in my other, more mundane life.
I should say, lest you think me a secret agent or other exciting being, that by secret project I mean something that I cannot openly discuss or explain here because it would have a detrimental effect on the ‘other’ me. It is a struggle, but sometimes in life you have to sacrifice something to gain something else. I have thought and planned much for my future this year, and my present has had to go somewhat on pause as a result.
2016 has been a hard year. Of course that is not just the case for me but for many of us. There have been let downs. It began back in January so terribly, and things have not often looked up since then. It has been hard to lay groundwork to change and improve life, but it has been necessary. Self-preservation is the first law of nature, said Samuel Butler.
Today I had an intense day following an intense several months, but I am pleased to say it has paid off – some excellent news came out of it, news which again I cannot share but news which I think will bring positive and welcome changes into my life for 2017. After today I can take my finger off that pesky pause button for a while, which is great news for ‘this’ me, because ‘this’ me has a third novel to write (a third novel which has been impatiently circling the lower halos of my mind for a very long time).
No, I have not forgotten how to write, nor lost my love of it.
No, I have not lost my desire to review and blog and attend events and immerse myself in this industry which so inspires and entertains me. Time is a premium, and time well spent on my real life now will better benefit this life in the year to come.
In the title words of an excellent piece of fictional writing:
“Do Not Forsake Me, Oh My Darling”
For am I still here, and shall be for many words and many stories yet to come.